What Kind of Man Is He?
Read through the descriptions below and select the report that best describes the man you’re interested in learning about.
STEP 1
Decide whether you’re after the free mini-report, or the full 19-page version.
What’s in the Reports | FREE Mini Report | Full $27 Report |
---|---|---|
How he sees the world (his dominant worldview) | – | X |
How the world sees him | X | X |
Why people (and possibly you) like him | – | X |
Why he drives people (and maybe you) crazy | X | X |
His core fear | – | X |
His journey through the four stages of maturity | 1 page | 8 pages |
Insights handout: “What I look for in a partner / colleague / friend and what you can do to ‘win me over’ ” | – | X |
Insights handout: “What I would ask of you to support me on my journey to maturity” | – | X |
Insights handout: “What ‘I’ll alter him’ changes you can (and shouldn’t) expect from me” | X | X |
Self-coaching questions (for you to ask yourself and him) | – | X |
STEP 1
Decide whether you’re after the free mini-report, or the full 19-page version.
FREE Mini-Report
Includes:
How the world sees him
Why he drives people (and maybe you) crazy
His journey through the four stages of maturity (one-page summary)
Insights handout: “What ‘I’ll alter him’ changes you can (and shouldn’t) expect from me”
Full $27 Report
Includes:
How he sees the world (his dominant worldview)
How the world sees him
Why people (and possibly you) like him
Why he drives people (and maybe you) crazy
His core fear
His journey through the four stages of maturity (8-page detail)
Insights handout: “What I look for in a partner / colleague / friend and what you can do to ‘win me over’ ”
Insights handout: “What you can do to support me on my journey to maturity”
Insights handout: “What ‘I’ll alter him’ changes you can (and shouldn’t) expect from me”
Self-coaching questions (for you to ask yourself and him)
STEP 2
Decide which man sounds most like the one you want to learn about.
NOTE You may recognize your man in two of the categories below, even ones that are at the opposite ends of the Solidity spectrum. That’s quite common; he’ll have his own unique way of applying those apparently contrasting personality styles, and you’re welcome to download more than one report. If you find yourself unable to decide and needing more than three reports, you may need to get to know him a bit better.

HE’S HARD to miss. His enthusiasm announces him when he walks into the room, and he naturally attracts a lot of attention. Others might watch with envy as he sparkles and bristles with restless energy and exciting ideas. He’ll be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at all hours, and a fast talker. People will watch and wonder how he can be so eternally optimistic and energetic. They’ll feel that they can get a booster shot of both, just from being close to him.
However, if anyone can’t keep up—and most people can’t—they’ll soon see the back of him. He won’t hang around. He doesn’t like to be around “boring”, “negative” or “heavy” situations for long—and “long” is a very short time for him. As soon as he senses any of those conditions brewing, he’ll start looking for something more exciting, whether it’s the next party, the next business idea or job, and sometimes even the next relationship partner.
Yes, he fits with this bunch, tell me more!
Not him? Try one of these:

HE PROBABLY won’t be the first person in the room that people notice. That’s by design. He’d rather hang back a little, and check everyone else out. To them, he may appear slightly mysterious and intriguing. What they don’t know is that while he may look as calm and confident as James Bond on the surface, he’s managing a degree of anxiety beneath it. Yes, he’s like the proverbial duck gliding on water while paddling furiously beneath it.
People will find his mysterious air attractive, but somewhat daunting. He’ll put them at ease when he starts to ask ques-tions about them. When people get to know him, they’ll dis-cover that he asks a lot of questions—about them, about other people, or about any situation that he’s getting into. This is true at home, at work, and with friends. They’ll also discover that he asks those questions not to be charming or polite so much as to settle his own wariness and anxiety.
Yes, he fits with this bunch, tell me more!
Not quite him? Try one of these:

HE’S NOT like all the other guys. He’s different. He’s deep. These are some phrases that he will have heard more than once by the time he turned 20. He’ll have understood what they meant. It’s not just that he dresses with a sense of style and creative flair, or that he stares off into the distance while others around him are jabbering about nonsense. Those are just indicators of his reflective self-awareness and tendency to question things—including himself.
He has the air of an intellectual—a thinker. Some people find that intriguing, some intimidating, and others may find it pretentious. To that last point, he would say that they don’t understand him. Lacking his deep sensitivity, they’re Philistines. To boot, he hates superficiality; nothing matters more to him than authentic, meaningful conversation. When people do engage him, they’ll discover that he actually is a thinker—he questions everything; he is different—he has a unique take on things; he is deep—he has a degree of mental and emotional flexibility that most other men don’t have.
Yes, I have to admit, he fits with this bunch, tell me more!
Still not him? Try one of these:

THE ULTIMATE strong, silent type? Perhaps. Although his strength will be less the strength of forceful aggression and more the strength of calm stillness in the face of the former. He’s also less likely to be the target of aggression—who would want to or need to, he’s such a calm guy—than he is to be a witness of it. As a witness, he’ll be tempted, if not likely, to step in and try to sort things out.
His air of calm stillness might lead some people to pay less attention to him. Let’s put it this way, he’s not going to be the life and soul of the party, nor the person who seeks attention. That said, some may find his relative silence intriguing—either to challenge it and shake it up, or to find out what secrets he’s hiding or wisdom he’s holding onto.
Yes, this is him, tell me more!
Not him again? Don’t give up yet.

HE’LL BE the last person to arrive at the office party, or Friday drinks. He’ll fetch his drink and slink back against the wall. For any conversation to happen, people will have to approach him. It’s not going to be the other way around. Those who do are likely to get blunt, one-word answers for their efforts—until he discovers that they work in the same field as him, at which point he’ll light up and become quite animated.
On the other hand, if someone meets him at a conference where he’s surrounded by his professional kin, they’ll find him in the middle of the floor, being as verbose as anybody. He might even be one of the speakers at said conference. They’ll also see him leave as soon as the subject matter discussions end. He won’t hang around for the chit-chat.
Yes, he’s this guy, tell me more!
Still not quite your man? Keep going:

IF PEOPLE wanted to identify him at, let’s say, a book launch, they’d just have to be there at the exact time that’s on the invitation. That’s when he’ll arrive. If anything, they might miss him because he was five minutes early. He’ll be dressed appropriately for the occasion, and he’ll follow all the protocols when he arrives, without fuss. After all, that’s what a person should do, right?
He could be caught frowning, or perhaps even glaring, at any-one who doesn’t follow protocol—who doesn’t do what they should, or what’s right. Someone who sneaks a place near the front of the author’s signing queue, for example, or who answers their phone while the author is giving their speech.
Yes, he’s just like this, tell me more!
Not him again? He’s special! Only a few more to go:

HE’S THE person everybody looks at from across the room and thinks, How does he do it? Or, How does he manage to be so put together? By this they’ll mean his polished professional image. There’ll be no loose edges or raggedy bits. He won’t have a hair out of place, nor a thread of clothing that’s out of fashion, nor a watch, briefcase or car that doesn’t reflect an aspirational level of status and achievement.
He’ll be so put together that people might at first see him as somehow untouchable. Yet, he’ll be very likeable, and they’ll soon figure that he’s also human. They might see him, for example, serving meals at a school charity function, in which case they might remark on his humility. Not that he’s Prince William or Tom Cruise, but given the way they regard him, he might as well be.
Yes, this sounds just like him, tell me more!
Still haven’t found him? That’s why you’re here , isn’t it? Keep going:

HE’LL BE the heart and soul of any social event. He’ll probably arrive late, having stopped along the way to do somebody a fa-vour, but once he’s there, he’ll be hard to miss. His warm-hearted ebullience and gregariousness will spill over and affect everyone around him. He might even be a little loud. Certainly, his humour and laughter will attract attention and lift the at-mosphere, though some, like the “Learned” and the “Strict” Right Men, might find it intrusive.
People will feel drawn to his warmth and generosity. They’ll feel that he’s straightforward—what they see is what they get—and that he has their best interests at heart. All true, of course. He’ll be eager to listen and will readily jump in with sugges-tions regarding any challenge they might be facing. He’ll com-monly offer to connect them with someone in his extensive network who might be able to help, whether it’s a vet for their cat or a potential funder for their new business.
Alas, I think I’ve found him, tell me more!
Still searching? Only one more to go:

PEOPLE’S FIRST impression of him will most likely be physical. And it probably won’t be his beauty and elegance that strikes them, so much as some variation of strength, solidness, and a low centre of gravity. If he’s tall, he probably won’t be lean, but big and imposing. Tall or short, and even in the odd case when he’s more slightly built, he’ll give the impression that he’s rooted to the ground in some way. If someone had to imagine trying to push him out of their way, they’ll quickly realise that they’ll have better luck with a tree. In a crowd of people, he’ll be the one that nobody messes with or tries to shove out of their way. Good luck to them. That will be the air that he gives off.
His personality will match his physical presence. He’ll be down-to-earth, and proud of his tell-it-like-it-is, no-airs-and-graces approach to life and people. He’ll wonder out loud why people are so sensitive and need to beat around the bush so much. Why can’t they just be straightforward, the way he is? His dress style will most likely be just as no-nonsense. He certainly won’t be a dandy.